Dan, Dan, the Coffee Man
by PanicAt221B-NoReally
Summary: Dan is a bored university student, reluctantly working at a local coffee shop. It's all the same until someone new comes in. A cute and hopefully funny one-shot. Hints at Phan.


**A/N:** Hi. So this is just a short, little one-shot I wrote a little while ago and finally got up the courage to publish. I am aware that caramel macchiatoes aren't that hard to make but I thought it was kinda ironic and works well with the story. Anyway, I'll stop rambling... enjoy!

* * *

><p>Order, pour, serve. Order, pour, serve. Order, pour, bored.<p>

Bored. There was no better way to put it. B-O-R-E-D. Dan was soooooooo bored as he forced himself to cleaned one of the coffee machines. Cringing as a congealed coffee clump landed on his hand. He glared a it as if it would get ride of its self if he did so. Giving up on this, he walked over to the bin and flicked the lump off.  
>Ew.<p>

My hands could be put to do much better use... Oh god... Not like that. He thought. I meant for Xbox. God brain. Speaking of Xbox... Xbox come save me, he thought to himself but still looking out the window, slightly hoping that his Xbox would burst through it and save him from his coffee shop nightmare. Unfortunately this wasn't just a bad dream and he was still on shift for another half hour.

Working in a coffee shop was not Dan's idea of a worthwhile weekend. He'd much rather be in bed, assuming the beloved browsing position he knew all to well, eating malteasers. Like any normal human being would want to be. Then Why? Why must he be put through this? Bills. Uni fees to be more precise. They don't pay themselves according to his Mum... "Unfortunately..." Dan mumbled to himself.

"Excuse me, can I get some service hear?" a blue suited man with short blonde hair and a briefcase snapped, standing at the till, breaking dan out of his cleaning reverie, waiting - impatiently in Dan's opinion - to be served.

"Hello, what can I get you?" Dan said with his fake smile already locked in place.

"Can I have the triple, venti, half sweet, non-fat, caramel macchiato to go" he said with authority. The what? Oh no. Quickly make an excuse. Brain, where are you when I need you?

"Errrrr... The ingredients for that are round the... place... Sort of... Ish... Thing... I'll Just go get them..." he ran - practically sprinted - into the store cupboard. Ignoring the blue suited man's sigh and his impatient eye role.

Why couldn't he just have told the man that the supplies for that drink were out of stock? He thought, hitting himself in the forehead before getting out his phone to look it up.

"Thank's for telling me now brain." he grumbled to himself.

"Traditional Cafe Macchiato. Latte Macchiato" he said, scrolling down the web page, "Aha!" he shouted in triumph, "Caramel macchiato". He face then fell. God. That looks complex. He thought, internally face palming (this time), trying to remember the steps.

"Well, nobody can say I don't try." he sighed, taking a deep breath. Bracing himself for his inevitable failure.

Coming out of the cupboard a few minutes later, carrying God knows what to look like he knew what he was doing, Dan tried to focus. "So, you do this here." He said putting pouring some vanilla syrup into the bottom of the cup.  
>"Then you get the milk." he mumbled to himself as he completed another step. Adding in his head, the special milk for Mr i'll-order-fancy-to-confuse-a-guy-who-obviously-has-no-idea-what-he's-doing-and-looks-new-which-he-is-to-seam-intelligent.<br>"Milk foam and expresso" he said grabbing more ingredients off the counter and making the milk foam.  
>"Next... Next..." Oh God. What comes next. Casually trying to look like he was still getting out ingredients, he bent down, facing the cupboard so he could check it on his phone.<p>

Oh the caramel drizzle... Obviously.

He stood up and drizzled what looked liked 'fuck you' in swirly caramel writing before covering it up with a zig-zag pattern.

He smirked to himself, placing the lid on. Mission accomplished he though as turned to the man, who swiftly paid and left, leaving the shop then sighed and relaxed. Thank fuck that's over. He then smiled and, checking that no one was around, turned away from the till and relaxed.

"Today we'd like to thank Mr Daniel Howell and his amazing coffee making skills" he said, in a very good (well, in his opinion) presenter voice.  
>He jumped so he was in the position of another person.<p>

"Oh stop it" he said, pretending to be embarrassed, flapping his arms about.

He jumped back, "His work is something for us all to aim at, stretching from your basic coffee to the infamous triple, venti, half sweet, non-fat, caramel macchiato."  
>This was then followed by a jump to a new position and added various 'oooooooos.'<p>

"From a humble boy to a coffee man" presenter Dan said, back in his position.

"You make it sound so difficult" he said laughing with himself as Members of the 'Dan' audience called out to him.

"Woooooooo Dan" he cheered.

"We love you Mr. Howell" in a girly tone.

"Please ladies," he said smugly, winking, "call me Dan"

"I hope my son grows up to be like you some da-"

"Erm excuse me" Cringe. Cringe. Cringe. Kill me now.

"Yes?" Dan said, eyes shut, as he turned round, very slowly.

"Can I get a drink please?"

"Of course" Dan said, refusing to look at the voice's owner, turning a deep shade of scarlet, "What can I get you?"

"Just a regular coffee to go, thank's"

Dan quickly turned around and began work on making the coffee, being his usual awkward self, trying to use the coffee machine 3 times before realising that he had tuned it off earlier so he could clean it.

"Ok, is that it?" he said as he turned back around and put the coffee on the counter, after finally making it, still not able to look at the mans face.

"Yes, thank's" he replied.

"Ok, well, that will be-" he looked up at the mans face, he was tall with black hair, his a fringe swept to the side. Dressed in black skinny jeans, like Dan, and a red and black checkered shirt adorned his chest. His eyes were a brilliant shade of the lightest, brightest blue.

"Hello?" the guy said, waving a hand in front of Dan's face as he stood there, staring.

"Oh yeah... Sorry" Dan said awkwardly as the man paid, chuckling slightly and smiling at Dan. He turned to leave, walking away however stopping at the door.

"Nice display by the way..." he looked back at Dan, "Coffee man" he smirked as he open the door and left.


End file.
